POMP, POWER and POLITICS

What A Marriage Means in My Native

Warning: Reader’s discretion required. Please don’t read if you have a very happy image of marriages.

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It means return on investment done on bringing up the perfect groom.

It means loss of substantial portions, sometimes all, of the savings of bride’s family.

It means the perfect case study of money squandering for both parties on the excuse that the marriages are once in life time opportunity of celebrations.

It means that both sides more or less are in debt after the marriage for the next 1-2-3 years depending on the source of income. Even the dowry given to groom’s family is sometimes all used up to balance out their debt.

It means higher costs for everything. Literally everything. 10 Rs/kg of cauliflower will be bought for 100 Rs/kg even in Mandi. You’ll pay 30-35 Rs/ Km or more for the luxury vehicles. (Luxury vehicles will be an Indica or Indigo)

It means gifts given to every relative and extended relative of the groom and the hospitality will be valued on the basis of those gifts. Higher the costs of those gifts, the better the hospitality( even if you didn’t find anything to eat, anyone to tell this and came back cursing the arrangements)

It means to tolerate the problematic relatives who have the habit of creating their own chaos in already chaotic circumstances. No matter how much hospitality you show, there will still be some relatives who'll complain of being ignored at the marriage.

It means the perfect show off in the society to give everyone something to talk about the marriage.

It means the perfect show off of all that jewelleries which have been kept hidden in the trunks for generations and wear them all even if you look like a clown. The more grams of gold on your body, the more virtuous the family.

It means to show off how many people you can call for your Baarat (the procession with groom). The more no. of people in the Baarat, the more social and influential you are.

It means to show off how many people you can feed who came in the Baarat and who came from your side. The more the no of people, the more impactful the marriage you managed.

It means the show off of fire arms. The more fire arms you can flash, the more powerful you are in that area.

It means to show off how many cars, Jeeps, SUVs you can take to the Baarat. The more the no. of vehicles, the more your power and money.


PS: Though I have drawn a very grim picture of my native but unfortunately most of the points are true. Also, I have taken a certain section of society to depict the mindset and these points don’t generalize to each and every marriage in that area. It’s not that marriage celebrations don’t have any positives but my cynicism and derision for above points outweigh those positives.